Chores- training little helpers

For the last few years I have hired wonderful teenagers to help me clean house because I was too overwhelmed with my small children to keep on top of it all. Since we have been in Germany I have not found anyone who lives close enough to help me and have been forced to go it alone.

I found that keeping everything picked up took so much time and these little boys could make messes faster than I could clean up, I knew I had to either teach them to help or hire outside help. After reading several helpful blog postings like Operation Chore Training, The Unlikely Homeschool and Confessions of a Homeschooler, as well as some great advice from my facebook friends I finally got my little guys trained and my house has been clean every day for more than a month now! Really!

It's what God gave you time for...

I love the saying "I was a perfect mother...until I had my first child". Looking from the outside in it seems like such a simple task, wipe a few noses, bake a few cookies, read a few stories. If only it were that simple. The world as a whole does not value motherhood on a full time basis. The world says sure it's nice to have one or two children, but why should women waste their skills staying home doing nothing?

Mother's don't just read stories, they plant seeds of character and imagination. Mother's don't just sing lullabies, they instill memories of love and a sense of belonging into the heart of a child. Mother's don't just pray, they build a foundation of faith so the child knows what path to follow. Mother's don't just teach, they inspire the love of learning and the desire to make a difference in the world. Mother's don't just have babies, they raise future leaders of nations.

Beautiful messes

I appreciated the recent article from Upside Down Homeschooling on Embracing the Imperfect. Lest any mom's think homeschooling is easy, it isn't. 90% of the time it is a struggle to stay on task, keep focused and stay positive. I love a clean house as much as anyone (perhaps even more than most) but one only has so many hours in the day and every minute spent cleaning is a minute spent away from my children. My one and only new years' resolution was to relax and not stress about the messes. I did terrible the first few months- walking into a room with stuff on the floor was like nails on a chalkboard. Then I had a baby. I had no choice, I could either scream, hire a housekeeper, or just not care. I do still care, but I am learning to not let it stress me out or feel like a failure because of it. This is what our school room/office looks like right now:

And this is what we have to show for it...

Simple things Sunday

We're spending this weekend skiing in Garmisch but I wanted to share a few favorite moments from last week. My baby girl is now six weeks old, and getting so big! She is sleeping 6-7 hours at night and is cooing and smiling all day long. She's such a blessing to our family!

6 weeks to go!

Sweet innocence (the appearance of...)

I love this little stinker! He is the sweetest little guy when he's not causing mischief. It's hard to believe this seemingly innocent little boy could be responsible for smashing an entire banana onto the floor mat in our reading area, coloring on the walls, or dumping an entire box of cereal on the floor (and all before noon)!



Unstructured play, fostering creativity

The past 6 weeks have taught me the value of unstructured play time.  I tend to be a major multi-tasker and like to have things scheduled and planned out. However, living in a house with no furniture, no television, no computer (at least for the first few weeks) and virtually no toys, has helped me learn to relax a bit and be more flexible.

Not having a TV frees up hours and hours of time available to live life rather than escape from it. Rather than resorting to that in the evening to relax, we cuddle up with books. The boys don't really have any toys and it's been very interesting to see their little imaginations kick into gear.

Joshua has totally thrived on this unstructured time. He is very creative and loves to "invent" things and this free time has really give him the freedom to use his imagination. He takes every cardboard box he can find and creates new inventions with them. He is constantly finding things around the house to balance and build with. The boys go on adventures in the backyard and spend more time exploring outside. Ethan typically spends half the day reading or working on the few school books we have and Grant plays with his stuffed doggie or roams around in the yard. We take more time to go to the park, the zoo, the bookstore and library and just have fun together. Amazingly, I haven't heard the phrase "I'm bored" a single time.

I for one am ready to get back to a schedule and routine, but it has been nice to take a break and just enjoy being together without any pressures or demands. I hope when we get settled in our new home and new schedule I can remember the value of letting their little imaginations run free and allow more unstructured play time.

Baby Girl Essentials

Having a girl after three boys will be quite a change for our family and I've been trying to plan all the things I'll need for her. I love to sew and used to sew all the time but frankly boys aren't all that fun to sew for and life just got too busy. The first thing I did when I found out this baby would "possibly" be a girl was to go out to Etsy and order a boatload of fabric (LOVE Riley Blake fabrics!) and I even got myself a new sewing machine since it is going to get a lot of use over the next few years.

Over the next few months I will share some of the fun girly projects I'm making, but first I wanted to share some of my favorite baby girl products sold on Etsy. There are some stinking cute things out there for girls!

Adorable handmade shoes: have you ever seen anything so darling? As soon as these come back in stock they are mine.

Let the shopping begin!

It's official! After waiting 6 long months we finally found out for sure...
we are having a girl!

I was so happy she cooperated better this time and since the ultrasound tech was 100% sure this time (rather than only 80% sure) she said it was definitely a girl. Phew! I was beginning to have dreams of alien babies ;)

Immediately following our appointment we headed up to the outlet mall in Indiana for our last shopping spree in the United States.








Here is the damage done, although it wasn't all for baby girl, some of it was for her brothers and yes, some of it was for me (I can still fit into regular clothes for a few more weeks...)




And here are the pink results! It's first time I've ever bought girly things and it wasn't for someone else's baby.

The Stroller Fleet

No one ever mentions the fact that if you plan on having more than one children you are going to go through a whole fleet of strollers. Meet our newest editions- strollers #6 the Bugaboo Cameleon and #7 the Peg Perego Si.

With my first child I purchase a travel system- a small lightweight stroller that the car seat could attach to and a single jogging stroller. Then baby number two came along and we needed a double. I got rid of both my single strollers, purchased the Graco Quattro Tour Duo stroller and a double jogger. Then baby number three came... We bought an umbrella for the older and the younger two rode in the doubles. Of course I contemplated trying to buy a tripple jogger, but gave up on the idea. I wish I'd kept the single jogger so I could have pushed one boy while my husband pushed the other rather than cramming them all in the double (which we did on several 15+ mile runs).

Bugaboo Cameleon

Baby number four requires a whole new system. The main reason is because we will be living in Germany! I remember my first trip to Germany seeing mothers out for walks, rain, snow or shine with their babies in old fashioned buggies with 4-wheel drive tires that can easily maneuver over cobblestone streets and six inches of snow, Russian-style buntings and adjustable umbrellas. They are certainly a sight to behold.

When I first learned I was pregnant and would be having the baby in Germany I knew I had to have one of those mega strollers. Partially out of want, and partially out of necessity. It would be impossible for me to push my current strollers on European cobblestone streets. Unfortunately, those mega strollers cost a small fortune when you add in all the accessories. Fortunately for me, I found a fabulous local deal that included everything! I just love the little basinette that hooks right onto the stroller and can't wait to join the german mamas strolling down the strasse.

Peg Perego Si

And as much as I love a double stroller, it's just not practical for European streets and metros unless you get the kind where the smaller child his hidden behind or below the other. My kids are too strong willed to sit blindly in the back, they need a view of everything.

Grant however, still needs to be in a stroller. After much research trying to find a small single stroller that would ride well on cobblestones and wouldn't break the bank, I finally found this Peg Perego Si. It's lightweight, fully reclines, has 4 wheel drive wheels that lock and costs just under $200. I LOVE this stroller. It took some engineering skills to figure out how to open and close it, but I was amazed at how well it steers! I can open a door with one hand and wheel it through with the other. If only I'd known there were strollers that were so easy to push! I will never go back to the pathetic small wheeled strollers of my past.

I plan on Baby Bjorning baby #4 as long as possible and by the time he/she (wishful thinking) is old enough to need the stroller, Grant will be old enough to walk. We'll probably also get the buggy board for our Bugaboo so when the older boys get tired they can catch a ride.

I'm also bringing along my double jogger for around the neighborhood, but for city trips we'll use strollers 6 and 7. I really hope we don't have to buy any more strollers in the near future!

Party of six...European Adventure

I have some news I've been dying to share, but haven't been able to...until now...we FINALLY know where we're moving...

To Germany!!!

We are SO excited. I LOVE Germany and have been dying to get back there. The bad news is I have to leave town NOW to get my car shipped and do all the fun processing and shipping.

In other news, we are expecting another baby in February! This pregnancy has been much harder on me than the others (I couldn't possibly have forgotten?). I felt pretty miserable until week 14 and lived off beans, quesadillas, and quacamole. I had zero desire to cook and the thought of anything sweet made me feel ill. Like magic, once I hit week 14 I started to get my energy and appetite back and actually cooked my first non-mexican meal, now I feel pretty much back to normal. And though I've only gained 5 pounds, unless I wear loose shirts, it's pretty obvious that I'm pregnant. I just hope I can find that maternity box I buried in the storage unit and hoped I'd never need again...

Anyhow, posts will be intermittent until the end of October while we get all moved, but I'll try to at least post a few updates on facebook...

Also, Congratulations to the Piper Reed book winners!

Joann T

Shirley D

Brooke W

A cure for "Mommy Brain"...

I have been feeling the need lately for some serious intellectual stimulation (being with three boys 24/7 will do that to a person). As much as I'd love to enroll in another master's program, that just isn't an option for me right now, but I knew I had to do something...

I've had a Khan Academy app on my phone for a while now but hadn't actually used it. I finally decided to try it out and I'm sure glad I did! I downloaded the Chemistry and the Calculus video sets. I was really surprised at how well these videos are put together and short enough you could easily fit in a lesson a day no matter how busy you are. They are explained in a way that makes perfect sense and it's so nice to see the exercises worked out right in front of you. Although I admit, after viewing the first calculus video I realized I needed to start over at Algebra and work my way up...

You can view the videos through the iTunes app or online at http://www.khanacademy.org, the online videos are more extensive. There are a variety of subjects available including many facets of math, science and history. Right now I am working on the US History Overview course, the Art History Course (fascinating- especially since I've been to a lot of these museums & historic sites), Chemistry and Algebra. I haven't taken Algebra since my first year of college at age 17, and I hated it. Now, I'm enjoying algebra! It's actually fun to work out the equations and I'm enjoying higher level thought processes again. Yes, I'm turning into a total nerd ;) And while I will probably never use electron configurations and won't need to calculate the sum of three consecutive odd integers, there are several formulas which are useful in "real life" and there is just something fulfilling about expanding the mind. Plus it gives me greater confidence that I will be able to help my children learn these things when they are older.


The best part is that it is absolutely free! I am learning so much faster than I learned in college and am enjoying it so much more. Forget facebook and pinterest, enlarge your cranium!

Lessons of single motherhood

The past 9 months acting as a single mom has taught me many lessons. The first is that I am definitely NOT cut out to be a single mom! I have gained some serious respect for you single mothers- I admire and revere you. It is not an easy job, the pay is lousy and there are no vacations.

The second is sometimes I am just surviving. I tend to look forward to the future more than I enjoy the present. These little ones grow so fast- it's so easy to focus on the misery of diaper changing and cleaning up messes and lose track of what a short time this really is and how quickly they will grow up. I try to "escape" by pampering myself or wasting time on the computer but never quite feel refreshed.


It dawned on me that I have been forgetting to"cast [my] burden upon the Lord, and he shall sustain [me] Psalms 5:22. I have been unnecessarily trying to bear the burden alone. It's amazing to me that by simply changing the frequency and sincerty of my prayers and scripture study, I suddenly don't feel quite as overwhelmed and alone. I still have disasters to clean up and screaming children to calm, but I am able to handle things better without feeling like I'm going to lose it.

The third thing I have learned is the importance of prioritizing. There are only so many hours in the day and even fewer hours I have alone. About two to be precise. I've discovered that if I do the things I want to do first, I never have time for the things I should do. On the other hand, if I do the things I should do first, I seem to always find time for the things I want to do. Of course it's always easier said than done, but when I actually put forth the effort and stick to a routine, though I am busier, I feel less stressed and more fulfilled at the end of the day and am better able to enjoy the simple moments of motherhood.

An Intentional Life

You may have noticed the new blog design and title. When I began this blog more than 5 years ago, it was a private blog to share photos with our family who lived 2,000 miles away. After making the decision to go "public" I was at a loss trying to come up with a name since I still blog mostly for me, for a family record and to share things that I'm learning in life, thus I blog about a million unrelated things...However the time has come for me to remove our last name from the blog, forcing me to choose a new name. The url remains the same, just the name has changed- although if you grabbed a button that will need to be updated (sorry! But it was either name change or go private again!)

"An Intentional Life" kind of sums up the kind of life we try to live. We try to make each day count; not to just wander this earth mindlessly seeking fleeting pleasures or living from one crisis to the next, but to plan out our future and work towards specific goals that will get us there.

One example of intentional living is our change to real foods and avoiding processed foods. We could wait for cancer or diabetes to inflict us, but we choose to take measures to prevent rather than deal with a future problem. Or our choice to invest for our children's education and our future missions. We make sacrifices today to save for a future that is relatively uncertain, but that we hope will provide a secure financial future for our children and a life of service for us. Intentional living is acting, not being acted upon. Choosing to obey God's laws and enjoy blessings rather than suffering consequences that occur when we disobey them.

Certainly our specific goals change over time and in the end we may have a completely different destination than when we started, but we have something to shoot for and we work for it each day, but the eternal destination never changes.

I love Joel Osteen, one my favorite quotes by him is "God wants us to live consistently, He wants us to enjoy every single day of our lives." Happiness is not something that we have to wait until the next life to obtain, we can experience joy NOW through the choices we make each day!

That is what I want the purpose of this blog to be. To share joy in the simple things of life, the pitter-patter of little feet, the hysterical belly laughs shared by brothers, the excitement of learning and the beauty of life. I want to live an intentional life, to align my future with the future that God has planned for me and enjoy, not just survive, life's journey.

Hoarders: toddler edition

Joshua, our middle child has always had hoarding tendencies. He would (and still does) cram all sorts of random junk into bags or boxes and carry them around the house and stack them in "secret" places. Now he has a backpack that he packs all sorts of things into including a full change of apparel, snacks and money.

Now, my sweet little baby is turning into a hoarder too! Or pack rat, not sure which. He picks up as many toys as he can find at once and MUST carry them all at the same time. As you can see from his big crocodile tear, he has trouble carrying it all and has a complete and total meltdown every morning because things keep dropping. I've tried to get him to carry a bag like his brother, but he still doesn't get it. And yes, that is a mini-colander on his head. It's his "hat".

At what point should I be concerned???

The Gentleness Challenge

As a mother of three boys born in three years, I have truly experienced the highs and lows of motherhood. There have been times when I couldn't imagine that life could ever get any better.

There have also been times I've felt a level of anger and frustration I have never before felt. Like the time I thought my 2 year old was quietly playing in his room, only to discover he had removed his soiled diaper and spread the contents all over his face, the crib and the walls. My first instict was to scream. Then cry. Then yell for my husband to come clean up the mess.

There's also the time my son wrote his name with orange crayon on our carpet. Or the time last week when all three hooligans dumped a Costco-sized bag of Craisins all over the house (and filled their socks with them), crushed a bunch of glass ornaments into millions of tiny pieces into the carpet and broke the leg of the desk I was putting together, in half.

It is very difficult to be patient during those times when you really want to wring someone's little neck. But I've learned that yelling does nothing but anger and frustrate them, sending them over the edge into even more misbehavior. They definitely respond better when I react calmly, so it is something I have really been trying hard to work on, however it is a real challenge at times. That's why I was so excited when I saw The Gentleness Challenge hosted by Women Living Well Ministries. I can't wait to learn new ways to discipline my children with love.

I love this quote "It’s interesting to note that all of the fruit of the Spirit address this very issue – the fruit of the Spirit is: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness and self-control (Gal. 5:22). When we walk in the Spirit – we will be gentle mothers. But when we walk in the flesh – we lack all of these attributes." That is so true. If we are followers of Christ, we should begin by seeking to emulate the attributes he has. What better mothers we would be if those attributes could be said of us. So if you're interested in joining the challenge please visit their website for ideas and support!

Homesick

The other night Ethan wanted to sleep in my room. (I've made a deal with him that he can sleep in my room once a week.) It was getting late and he was still wide awake staring at the ceiling. I asked him what he was thinking about and he said he was missing daddy. So we talked about all the things we missed.

In the morning he drew this picture for me. I asked "are we sad?" he said, "yes, we're missing daddy and our house in Kentucky".

Notice the thought bubbles to a stick figure of daddy and a little house. So cute!

We're all just a little homesick for our daddy, our friends and our old home!


Then this morning, he handed me this little note. I love my little five year old artist.

Parental rights?

Do you have a say in what your children will or will not be taught in schools? Do you have a right to your child's medical information? Do you have the right to teach your child religious values? Should CPS be allowed to remove children from homes where there is no clear evidence of abuse?

There are some who assume that since the constitution doesn't specifically include rights for parents that means they don't have any rights. If you think you have the right to make decisions for your child, watch this video. Your parental rights are being infringed upon and this is just the beginning. Take a stand now before the generation of entitled children has so many "rights" that they start making decisions for you.



I am not a conspiracy theorist and I don't think the government is out to get me. I think that in this world there are a few evil people and a lot of dumb people. Unfortunately both types tend to gravitate toward positions of authority. Personally I don't want either evil or dumb people making decisions for me and my family.

Politics has never been something that interested me. I have been pretty content to live my nice little life and let the politicians worry about that boring stuff. It wasn't until I read Skousen's book The 5,000 Year Leap that my eyes were opened to the ideas and principles this nation was founded on and the deterioration of those fundamental principles. They didn't want the career politicians that we have today- they wanted people who loved this country and were willing to offer their services for the sake of it. I realized that if I do not get involved not only am I subject to the laws that those people make but I can't even complain about it because I sat back and watched it happen (or buried my head in the sand so I couldn't see it happening).

Unfortunately the majority of young voters have no idea about the principles this country was founded on. Many simply want a free handout and don't take the time to realize that someone (you and I) has to pay for it. If only they could see the future implications of a government that "takes care" of you. And the majority of voters that do care and that do have strong values and principles are often silent.

I have commited myself to pulling my head out of the sand, start paying attention and do something. You might think that as a busy mom you can't make a difference. But it is mothers who can and should be making these decisions. We care about the future generation because we are raising them. We have a right to decide the kind of world our children will grow up in. Politics is not something for professionals and academics, it's for us, the people.

It really doesn't take much effort. Simply educating onesself on the issues, researching and choosing a political candidate for president who supports values and ideas the founding fathers would approve of, and writing your congressmen on important issues. Don't leave the job of educating your children on political issues and the founding of America to the schools, you are their best teacher (clearly they didn't do a good job educating us about government and politics).There are also organizations you can join such as American Family Association who will email you about family related issues as well as provide information on what you can do to help.

Still not convinced this is important? Need a little motivation?

One reader will receive a free copy of Skousen's 5,000 Year Leap!

The Entitlement Trap Giveaway

I absolutely LOVE this book! If I could choose my favorite parenting book it would probably be this one. The Eyre's have such great ideas about raising responsible people and emphasize the importance of starting early. I love the overall concept of this book- to allow your children to learn from their mistakes while they are young and the stakes are low, rather than when they are adults and the stakes are high.

This applies not only to financial decisions but moral, ethical and other important decisions that must be made in life. I purchased the book to learn how to teach my children good financial responsibility, but found that it offered so much more.

My children are a little young to implement the full household economy, but I have gotten so many great ideas that I can start implementing- such as being paid for doing certain tasks around the house and rewarding them for good behavior rather than just handing out an allowance.

I also love their ideas for establishing and writing down traditions in a prominent place where they become an important part of family life and the idea of keeping family stories to read to the children at bedtime. Their ideas for teaching children how to make responsible choices about drugs, sex, and life goals is invaluable. Helping children make these decisions before they are ever faced with them prevents those spontaneous bad decisions. The whole idea is to prepare your children for the things they will face in life and to do it while they are young so that they can learn how to make intelligent decisions and avoid the confusion and frustration most teens and young adults face.


Here are just a few of my favorite quotes:

• "It is parents, by not saying no and by giving kids what they demand, who become the ultimate enablers. We pour unearned praise over them, protect them from criticism of teachers and coaches, give them everything from toys to automobiles, and make no connections between their freedoms and their responsibilities. We seem to be working for our kids' approval rather than their working for ours."
• "As our lives get busier...we give our kids things instead of time.
• "Entitlement really is a kid trap...it stifles children's initiative, encourages self-centeredness, and mutes their natural and healthy fear of consequences. It makes them feel like the world owes them a living and destroys the connection between effort and reward."
• "...Indulgence...[and] anti-responsibility...holds them back from their potential, from adventure, from their independence, from their creativity, from their fulfillment, and from their happiness.

I love this book so much that I am going to be sending one lucky reader a free copy of The Entitlement Trap!

To Enter:

Leave a separate comment for each entry:

• You promise to read the book if you win!
• If you blogged or facebooked about this giveaway
• If you are a public follower and/or have my button on your blog

The winner will be announced on October 17th. (Be sure to include your email address or have it linked to your profile if you want me to email you- otherwise you will have to check back to see if you are the winner!)

U.S. and Canada Addresses only.
If the prize is not claimed within 3 days a new winner will be chosen.
GOOD LUCK!

Count your blessings...

I was going through my blog posts adding labels that I've neglected for so long...and I found this draft post from last year! Although my "baby" is almost two now and I can only dream of 70 degree weather the other sentiments are still true so I thought I'd publish it anyway. Better late than never...

The other day I was sitting on my back porch holding the baby, the boys were playing on the swings, it was about 70 degrees, I could feel the warm sun soaking in my skin, and it felt like I was on vacation. I thought back to when I was working full time and going to school full time and would daydream about how much fun it would be to not have to work, to just stay home and play with my kids all day. Of course it hasn't been much of the vacation I planned- I didn't expect to have three kids in three years, live far away from my family and friends, have my husband be a bishop and be gone almost every night, but this moment I realized I am living my perfect dream life.

I've always been a whiner, but when I stop and count my blessings I realize how lucky I am. I've had opportunities to travel the world and have fun adventures, I have three beautiful healthy boys, we have a fabulous back yard they can play in, I have a wonderful husband who loves me, I've been able to get a graduate degree, learn hobbies like photography, scrapbooking and cooking that keep me sane and make me feel alive, have great people here that love my kids like they're their own grandchildren, I have goals and dreams for the future that I know I can accomplish. There have been times in our life when we have been so happy we look at each other and wonder if it could really get any better?